Twikst

Living in a world between normality and insanity


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Alone or Lonely

companionship-fingers-197x300Sometimes I find myself sitting and wondering if I will ever find the right person for me. In the past nine years I have been single. For the first six of those I needed to be single to sort my own life out. I needed to learn to love myself so I could love others as well. It was tough and sometimes I wanted to give up but eventually I got used to being by myself. I got used to comforting myself and encouraging myself. I learnt to live with who I was and I learnt to love who I was.

But now, for the past three years I am ready to love someone again. Although I will have to learn to be unselfish with my time again, I want to have someone else around. Someone to cuddle and talk to, someone to be intimate with, someone who loves me despite myself. So where is this wondrous man that I am looking for? I don’t really know, but I do know that he is probably out there somewhere and I need to be patient. I also know that I need to get out there and meet people which is really hard for me. Meeting new people is scary but how else am I supposed to meet the person for me?

In all of this though I question my motives behind wanting a man in my life. Is it because I am lonely, scared of being alone or is it really about companionship. I have realised that I am not looking for someone because I need that person to define who I am or because I don’t feel worth enough by myself but simply because I was created to be in relationship. I look at my grandparents who are still very much in love and I want that when I am old, someone who I shared my life with. images

If you are single out there how do you feel? Do you long for someone, are you happy by yourself, does it not really matter to you. Let me know where you stand. Alone or Lonely? Proud to be single or longing for someone? Share your thoughts and opinions with me please. Do others feel the same as me or am I alone in this?

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Good for the Soul – Part Two

2014.07.18-20 - McGregor Retreat (85)_Snapseed

The first thing that was good for my soul was the doing of something for others which we did on Friday and you can see that blog before this one. The second thing I did this weekend which was good for my soul was doing something for myself and that is exactly what I did. On Friday around lunchtime we packed the car and four of us set off in a stuffed car for McGregor to join a bunch of girls for a girlie weekend looking at Tradition One.

2014.07.18-20 - McGregor Retreat (9)_Snapseed We arrived around five pm and there were already some people there. Unpacked and ready to chill, and chill we did, it was freezing there so I had my beanie, gloves and scarf as well as blanket around me. Fire blazing in the fireplace and I was ready f2014.07.18-20 - McGregor Retreat (223)_Snapseedor the weekend.

What followed was one of the most amazing weekends that I have had in a long time. A weekend filled with making new friends, getting intimate and trusting others. I have never felt so vulnerable and safe at the same time. I must thank each and every lady there for making this weekend happen and playing a part in helping me grow.

Can’t wait for the next one. I feel refreshed and ready to take on the world and my life again. I really needed this break and time away, the love and respect I got was an added bonus. Sending love out to all the ladies who were with me this weekend.