Twikst

Living in a world between normality and insanity


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Alone or Lonely

companionship-fingers-197x300Sometimes I find myself sitting and wondering if I will ever find the right person for me. In the past nine years I have been single. For the first six of those I needed to be single to sort my own life out. I needed to learn to love myself so I could love others as well. It was tough and sometimes I wanted to give up but eventually I got used to being by myself. I got used to comforting myself and encouraging myself. I learnt to live with who I was and I learnt to love who I was.

But now, for the past three years I am ready to love someone again. Although I will have to learn to be unselfish with my time again, I want to have someone else around. Someone to cuddle and talk to, someone to be intimate with, someone who loves me despite myself. So where is this wondrous man that I am looking for? I don’t really know, but I do know that he is probably out there somewhere and I need to be patient. I also know that I need to get out there and meet people which is really hard for me. Meeting new people is scary but how else am I supposed to meet the person for me?

In all of this though I question my motives behind wanting a man in my life. Is it because I am lonely, scared of being alone or is it really about companionship. I have realised that I am not looking for someone because I need that person to define who I am or because I don’t feel worth enough by myself but simply because I was created to be in relationship. I look at my grandparents who are still very much in love and I want that when I am old, someone who I shared my life with. images

If you are single out there how do you feel? Do you long for someone, are you happy by yourself, does it not really matter to you. Let me know where you stand. Alone or Lonely? Proud to be single or longing for someone? Share your thoughts and opinions with me please. Do others feel the same as me or am I alone in this?

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Good for the Soul – Part One

So Friday was Madiba’s birthday and the first one without him here so we had to make it special. Every year in South Africa on Madiba’s birthday people around the country are encouraged to give up 67 minutes of their time towards a cause or just helping2014.07.18 - SACAP 67 Minutes (11)_Snapseed their fellow humans. You can do anything from handing out sandwiches to the homeless, running a soccer clinic for underprivileged kids to working in a soup kitchen or handing out blankets to the less fortunate. The reason we call for 67 minutes is because Mandela spent 67 years in public service trying to make the country a better place. One minute for every year he spent in public service. By doing this we make a small gesture of solidarity with humanity.

This year I went with my college to Afrika Tikkun. According to their website Afrika Tikkun is dedicated to investing in education, health and social services for children, youth and their families through its community Centres of Excellence and strategic partnerships. We spent the weeks prior to Mandela Day collecting clothing, blankets and non-perishable food. Aiming to collect 67 of each we collected way over that so thanks to everyone for contributing. With all the goodies packed we set out Friday morning to Delft cars packed with people, love and a willingness to serve. When we got there we were greeted by one of the workers there who showed us where to go so we could see how we would be helping. On the wall was a big chart numbered with volunteers, students and another organisation show who would go to which house in the community. It was explained to us that we would be dropping off food parcels and asking some questions in houses around the community. Then we got to it packing the blankets and food we had bought into bags to go to each home. Once we were partnered with our volunteer we set off.

2014.07.18 - SACAP 67 Minutes (10)_SnapseedMost of the houses there are just these small one-room houses which they divide into two rooms with various wood and dividers. The house I went to was separated like this so it had a small lounge/kitchen and room. The lounge probably the size of my kitchen at home, I felt so blessed. Despite not having much and living in poverty when we arrived we were greeted with big smiles and hugs from the two sisters who lived there. While we were talking to them there were children running in and out the house and I eventually asked how many children lived there with the two sisters and the answer was eight. Eight plus the two adults equals ten people living in the tiny little house the size of my lounge. I was shocked to discover there was only one bed and the kids slept on the cold concrete floor all around the house. Never befor2014.07.18 - SACAP 67 Minutes (50)_Snapseede have I appreciated my bed and covers so much.

So there we were, eight of us, sitting around and listening to the stories these two ladies had to tell us. Afrika Tikkun began helping them around two years ago and is helping them get a disability grant for the one child who is disabled. They assist with blankets and food parcels and with getting IDs and such things. The one mama was telling us how the children sometimes don’t go to school because of the gangs and it’s too dangerous for them. They said if there was transport to fetch the children it would help so much.

We left 67 minutes later with heavy hearts and plenty of ideas bubbling to the surface of how we wanted to further help, like putting in vegetable gardens and such things. Back at Afrika Tikkun we met up with everyone else and saw that we were not the only ones affected by the poverty and suffering out there. Hopefully some of our ideas will lift of the ground and we can help others outside of these 67 minutes.